What's In A Name?
It's a bit like that old lack-of-equality medical office scene where the guy in the white coat greets the woman perched on the end of the examining table (naked except for a disposable pink gown) with, "Hello, Susan. I'm Dr. Barton." Aaargh.
When I was a seminarian, I was fortunate that both of my field education experiences were in congregations that had women pastors, and I learned a good bit from each of them. The second one, in particular, one Pastor Linda Wilson**, had no problem with "pastoral authority," a concept that we heard a lot about at seminary. She was a strong and confident woman, a fine leader and excellent preacher. The people of her congregation called her "Pastor Wilson" or sometimes "Linda," They never called her "Pastor Linda." When she spoke, then listened.
Among my seminary colleagues were a brother-sister pair. Subsequent to graduation/ordination, they were known as Pastor Green -- not Pastor Paul -- and Pastor Kathy, even though they lived miles apart.
We recently attended a ceremony where a newly ordained seminary graduate, called to serve a congregation, was installed in the position. Throughout the proceedings, she was referred to as "Pastor Bonnie".
My home church has a calling to support seminary education by employing a third-or-fourth year student as a vicar for one year. This individual functions as a pastor in every way apart from presiding at the Table and performing weddings. As best I can recall (and my memory is at times faulty), the four most recent men and women have been Samuel, Edward, Vicar Beth and Vicar Alice.
Huh?
As my husband said when I pointed it out to him, "It's a subtle thing." But an important one.
And perhaps it is also infantilizing.
It may well be, I concede, that these women have chosen this form of address. I haven't asked them. But I hope not.
Because -- to me, at least -- it's one more shred of evidence that the patriarchy is alive and well. But subtly, of course.
*Cranky Old Woman
**As is my custom, all of the names have been changed to protect both the innocent. And the guilty. Except for Kristina.
Comments
I do also wonder if (assuming each pastor is choosing how they introduce themselves and thus how they are generally addressed) that some feel the need for the surname to give them "authority" and others prefer to present an air of "friend" so use their Christian name. Oh...do I mean Christian name or do I mean First name....there's another can of worms....
Hugs!
But the "I'm Doctor Smith and you are First Name" no. I usually just smile and say "I prefer to be addressed as Ms. XX". All my office visit records probably have a notation about me being a crank.
Ceci
While we are in the subject, my son would bring his friends home from school ( either high school or college) and they often referred to me as “Mom”. I wasted no time in correcting them. “I am not your Mother. You can call me Ms Tyler.”
Big hugs!