Scattered and Floating, Near Philadelphia
It has been two months now since I learned that my job is being given to someone else, and the feelings have been all over the chart.
There are still three months until my salary comes to an end. Three months of working very closely with the man who has told me I am no longer needed. Three months of moving towards end-of-year celebrations. Three months of planning and preparing for the next academic year, a year that does not include me. It grows more and more difficult to be the upbeat and thoughtful presence I have always tried to be.
I've been feeling grey, mostly, with tiny bits of hope in the midst of all of that grey. I've made this dozen blocks that are greys with bits of brights and like them very much. I believe you can click on the photo to see them better.
I like them scattered and floating, kind of like me. Now I need to figure out if it is possible to set them that way.
Comments
Great blocks you created to express where you are. Can you put wide borders around them (whatever color you choose), and then twist them and cut new squares that will leave those inner blocks topsy turvy? I'm not explaining it well, but maybe you can catch what I mean?
While I contemplated my comment I found myself thinking "what would Nancy say to me if I were in this situation?" Back in the day, a lot of wisdom and compassion was what I needed and it overflowed. I can't pull that together here but I know it's within you.
And my inner librarian sends you some block placement hints:
http://funthreads.blogspot.com/2012/09/how-to-set-blocks-on-wonky-tilt.html
http://www.freshlemonsquilts.com/
On this one, scroll down to "Irregular Grid;" maybe that would help.
http://www.oregonpatchworks.com/MembersOnlyClub/Tutorials/BQ101_2011_12.pdf
The quilt I began then is unfinished but the blocks are made. I chose the colors of earth, wind, fire, and water as I felt I had been rocked to the core. Perhaps I'll get it out again and call it I Will Survive. At any rate, so far, so good. I'm nearly 62.
What I lost was my career as a registered nurse because I could not meet anyone's attendance requirements because of the lupus fatigue. Most of the time, it's okay, but sometimes I still have to cry a bit. I miss nursing so very much and I know so much that is sitting in my head. Sigh!
Love your tempest-tossed blocks. You will survive, too. It is well with your soul.
Hugs!
Namaste
Your journey is complex these days-glad to see you voice your topsy turvy feelings in your quilts.
Warmest regards,
Anna
Judy
Sucks that you lost your job to a younger person, but look, you could make some serious money from your quilts. Those are works of art and people would happily pay big bucks for one of your beautiful creations. Heck, I'm very envious of the one you gave my mom. I have always wanted a quilt of my own and even foolishly considered trying to have one that my great grandmother made restored, but.....I don't know anything about the cost of such a venture and anyway, right now, I am too preoccupied trying to figure out what to do about housing, as my time here is rapidly waning, as are my options. I keep praying that a benefactor will step forward and buy and move this house to a KSU owned vacant lot over on the next street. I'm sure that Dunkin' would happily let this house go for $1 just to get it off of their property. It's a century home with many beautiful old historic features in each apartment (of which there are three, my one bedroom and a two bedroom upstairs and a three bedroom downstairs, so this would make someone a tidy little sum of retirement rental income!).
Take this opportunity to examine the next chapter of your life. Could you afford to retire? Start your own quilt business? Become a professional blogger? You have the time now to examine all of your options and decide what's next. I don't have those options, being a single gal fully dependent on my own income for survival. If I fail to find adequate housing in the next few weeks......I don't EVEN want to think about what that might mean.......so count your blessings and know that you have a very marketable skill that can make you some very good money as a self employed businesswoman. Check our your public library, there are some very good resources on how to start a home based business! Good luck and keep us all posted!
Blessings,
~Sally
As the date of my eviction nears and no housing is on the horizon, you can imagine what a jumble of nerves I am about where I am supposed to go. Can't return home, no room at the inn, I am told, so right now, all I can do is to pack up my apartment and rent a storage locker and hope that maybe I can rent a room in a college rooming house with a bunch of 19 and 20 year old college kids (about all I can afford these days) and hope that they don't drive me utterly crazy with their loud parties day and night. Heck, it would be a roof over my head, but after living on my own for almost 30 years, having to share quarters with a bunch of kids for whom I am old enough to be their grandmother would probably drive me insane.
But I have few, if any, options left. College rooming houses are going begging and are a dime a dozen and rooms are at least affordable and in walkable neighborhoods, much as I'd prefer my own apartment. If it means keeping a roof over my head, I suppose I could just stay in my own room most of the time and not interact with the kids since I tend to prefer my privacy. Most of them have washers and dryers in them as well, which would be a nice bonus. Still, the prospect of having to share quarters with a bunch of partying college kids is not my idea of how I wanted to end up at this stage of my life, but with gentrification has come dwindling housing choices unless you want to pay big bucks for upscale luxury apartments, which are being built as fast as they can be constructed here.
So count your blessings if you have your own home. Everything else is just gravy.